Funny Stuff while I was...

It has been a really long time since, I have put words to virtual paper. I have been writing in my own personal way with a journal, of sorts. It started as a gratitude journal and has morphed into more of a place to put thoughts. But, it is private, and while that is good, I guess sometimes you just want to be 'heard'.

Funny, how you can look at pictures and feelings/memories/smiles/tears/ laughter/joy/pain can wash over you. It could be any combination of what I mentioned, OR even more. All could happen at once too. Well, I had that happen to me. Now, I really wish that I could still share the memories of those pictures with someone very special to me. Unfortunately, I can't at this moment. OH, it is nothing serious like a coma or death; just two people moving in differnet directions. However, I am not completely sold on that idea. In my honest opinion, I think we are more closely aligned than before but how to convey that message?

Funny, what can be conveyed with a picture. When you look back at the "moment capture" of the event or time, you can really see the feelings or emotions of that moment. What is sad, is how sometimes we just don't realize what is happening when it does. Or, maybe we do but we choose to ignore OR maybe even worse, take it for granted. I really don't know. At least, I am aware that I don't know and I try to be more aware nowadays.

My goodness, how much I miss her. Looking at picures almost brought me to tears. I could feel the swelling in my eyes as I looked and remembered BOTH the good and the bad. It was important to know that there were both. Funny how time will sometimes just make the bad memories fade and only let the good ones keep their shiny-glossy image. I know now that it is about both, and it is how you navigate between those two courses.

Maybe this all started when I went to witness a 50th wedding anniversity. Actually, I know that is what did it. Amazing how much love these 2 partners had for each other at the present, and through the years. This was evident through the story of pictures and even the toasts by friends and family. As, I watched the picture slideshow that went through the years, with corresponding music of that era, I noticed all of the good times. This started me thinking of how lucky they were, but I had to stop and say "there were tough times" too. And, it wasn't luck, it was hard work. After, that moment of clarity, I realized that it was a celebration of their love and the family they started. It caused me to look inside to see the joy that I got from my loved ones, family, and friends. I felt BLESSED about the people who used to be in my life, currently in my life, and those yet to become a part of my life.

Now, I just need to continue to live my life to its fullest, and make the best positive impact that I can on those who will bless my life with their pressence.

thanks.