Insomnia

well, i guess it was just a matter of time before i wrote a blog due to the inability to sleep.  actually, in my case it is the inability to turn my brain off for a few hours.   some might think, that it was because i was so busy in life with the juggling of a career, family, debt and all the other parts of the american dream. :)
the issue is that i wish i were truly juggling a career and a significant person within my life.  wondering how i will add those components OR maybe the better description is how i get those BACK into my life.
i was doing fine, especially after getting back from a recent debacle trip to vegas.   (i would tell you but YOU know that i can't.  it is VEGAS-LAW!)

the trip was wonderful but the clarity that comes from bad decisions we make for ourselves or when bad things happen to you can be like a splash of cold water to the face.   now, i would like to think that i have matured enough to think the 'cold water to the face' days were behind me.   they are not.  but, i would say the frequency of them has decreased.  so, i take that as a win.   and, i guess that is the important part to see...the good or the improvement that we still can make.   the shitty stuff will always be there because unfortunately, that is what we are always and easily reminded of.  it takes real strength of character to see the good in any situation while NOT ignoring the bad but just not focusing on it.

see, that is what i am trying to keep doing with my own experiment/game of life.   i just want to be as happy as i was in
the picture.   i am working on it but sometimes i just don't see the
results.  well, i guess i just have to keep adjusting the process to get a
new result that i want.

-just a few sleep deprived cents.