3's to Maturation

sometimes, i am just struck by how efficient the human brain can work. how you can just seem to have the clarity of thought to explain things, but usually those things tend to be after the fact. guess, that is why hindsight is 20/20. anyways, today it struck me that maturity is something that takes its own time for each person. exactly, the reason why maturity level is different for each person out there. so, what am i taking about?

it seems to me that each person has to go through 3 stages before they reach maturity. maybe, maturity is the wrong term....maybe it should be emotional intelligence? the idea being that we all have to go through these 3 stages at least once before we become an emotionally developed person. or, at least that is the case for me. :) so, yes, i am basing my whole theory on a single but highly studies data point....me.

so, what are the 3 stages?
1. allowing yourself to open your heart to another person. basically, this is putting yourself into a situation where you open yourself to another person. if you are lucky enough, maybe you fall in love but hopefully you meet a person that knowing makes you crave to grow.

2. working through a tramatic event. we all have shit that happens to us, sometimes it isn't our fault and we just have to work though it. the good part of these events is that they often lead to change. as we all know, change is never easy and never occurs without some sort of "pain". when the status quo no longer is "painless" is the time that changes occurs.

3. knowing that you are ready to make changes to your life. this is a tough thing for everyone because at this point a person has to acknowledge they are not perfect and maybe even a little wrong. nobody likes being wrong. but, this is an opportunity for growth. when you see the opportunity then you know you are reaching maturity.

now, the interesting part of this is how this seems to occur in 30's for most folks. and, this make seems to match up when most folks become "mature" or grownups. the reason that seems to make the most sense, is that you have finally had enough time to experience the 3 events. that isn't to say that some people won't experience it sooner or later.

for me, it all happened by my mid-30's, 35 to be exact. i meet a wonderful woman that i allowed into my life, and wanted in my life. i was fired from a job that i had for 10+ years. and, i decided that my life, my attitude, and my treatment of people had to change. all this happened, and what strikes me was that so many people that i knew made mention of the changes that i was attempting to make permament in my life. that was extremely powerful and rewarding to me.

so, now that maturity starts in a person, i don't think that growth cycle or process improvement ever stops. i mean we continue to have good and bad events in our lives, and we still look for ways to make ourselves better. just my thoughts on it. maybe, one to many beverages made it not flow as well as i hoped but at least i am trying. :)

thanks, and i hope you got something.